this is wut happened tonight

31 March, 2006


This evening my sister came to visit my parents…she knocked the door several times..sent her little daughter to nag on me in order to open the door for her,,,but of course I refused…my sister tried again by sending SMS saying that she misses me and blah blah,,,,all that didn’t work!!!

I decided to send her a harsh msg …and I did…..

I don’t want things to get back as they were….want to change many things in my life but couldn’t…..do I have to wait long until I get what I want?…I believe that my sister permitted others to screw up her life..she gave up ,,,,she used to dream but figured out that dreams are just dreams,,,,,I refuse to be a copy of her…a copy of her sufferings….i don’t want to repeat her mistakes……..i don’t want to let others screw up my life,,,,becoz its MY LIFE not theirs!!!

Sometimes I tell myself that I have to give up and be another one like them having the same sick mentality coz alone I can’t accomplish anything…….sometimes I feel that I have no more energy to fight,,,but I keep on reminding myself that I should be stronger otherwise I should dump myself to the nearest trash bin!!!

Well, although that gives me hard time but at least I know that I am living for something valuable!!!!!!

Am I asking for something impossible?

3 comments:

Arshad said...

Asalaam alaikum,
If we remember what our purpose in life is, insha'Allah everything else will fall in place.
wasalaam,
Arshad

ArabLady said...

thx arshad 4 dropping by ....

arab woman said...

please u should keep fighting to arrive and catch ur goal ,, YOUR LIFE ..
tell me plz ,, if we live as others want us to be ,, so why u live ??
why we have to spend our life as what they like it to be .. it YOUR LIFE ,, MY LIFE ,, HER LIFE ,, NOT THEIRS ..

I KNOW how much this hard and tire you ,, but it's time ,, just time untill u get your dreams , your life ,, and finally u should be as what you are exactly ..