21 October, 2006

I am really pissed off, I just came across a post advising men to back off when it come to enforcing women to cover up…the post was great but reading the word “our women” insulted my feminism!

” OUR”, “OUR”…..”OUR”!

“Am I a commodity, a peace of furniture, or does he own me!?

The reason why I like Dr. Nawal AL Saadawi is that she calls for women’s right to give the baby his mother’s family name!

Yes, why not!!!

And yes I wish if men could back off when it comes to veiling! I believe it’s the woman’s sole decision. Who are they to decide on our behalf! I would never enforce my daughter to cover up just because:

I might be ashamed of her in public when going out uncovered …I don’t want her to judge ppl based on a piece of cotton/silk or wutever on the head!
Or just because I am might be worried about her being sexually harassed.
Plus It’s not an accurate measurable indication of Iman/faith!!! It might be, but I do see girls who fast, pray, and read Quraun but are uncovered! And their behaviors are much better than those who are covered by force!

I really feel insulted to cover up just because I might sexually arouse a man in the street! It’s my body. MY…MY Why shall I spend my whole life in the shadow? Why shall I feel that I’m a Satan on Earth!! I fed up…is it really difficult for them to control their animalistic desires! Well, I guess it’s their problem then!….they should lower their gaze if they are scared of committing a sin by looking at a woman…..

In short, if a woman wants to cover herself from head to toe then she must be the one who is making such a decision neither her dad nor husband!

I had no intention to blog esp that I had a hectic night yesterday. It was beautifully ended by a car accident near the busiest roundabout in the city!!
Guess what, for the first time ever in my life…. i went to the police station! I was on my nerves the whole one & a half hours …my blood was boiling from madness at the idiot who I hit…. Don’t worry nothing major.....just the police officer couldn't judge whose fault it was! At the police station, I met a Syrian girl who hit a little kidoo but THX God the kidoo is not hurt….oppps I started blablabing,,,well I will tell u the details later!

Unfortunately, we have to farewell the visitor of October. So on the joyous occasion of the Eid, I extend my best wishes to you and the people you love. Wish you many treasured moments of happiness and peace.

Happy Eid, Love you all


Sabra said...

Eid Mubarak to you too AL. & Yes I agree with you that Arab Women have the total right to live their life the way they see right not under the manhood thoughts of whats right! Plus did you know that Allah is calling all humans in judgement day by their mothers name SO why not children be named after their moms. Our nation have a lot of CHANGE that we must go through to get our womanly rights. You know it bothers me too how we women suffer in such a culture thats why I am not going to live in Oman no more. But I will always stand for us, all of Arab women.

Abed. Hamdan said...

i beleive that nobody forces anybody to do anything these days, but as a man, i prefere to be engaged to a veiled woman.

ArabLady said...

Sabra, ok finally ,,,speaking ur mind!

Eid Mubarak to u hon….honestly I don’t advise u to go back to Oman..u will definitely have a cultural shock and will never know how to adapt!!! Let SOME ppl in our societies fix their mentality then the place would be tolerable for us to live in!

Well the point is a woman must stand up for her decisions, refuse to be dominated..if she wants to be veiled then its Fabulous why not…but at least not to be forced!

Welcome again :)

I won’t argue with u coz after all its ur business but may I know why u prefer the veiled woman?

By the way, sounds u r living in NW! I guess woman in Saudi Arabia and Iran are forced to cover up?

I bet u that any girl who lives in a religious or conservative environment, the first thing her dad, bro, or husband would do is to force her wear the Hejab even if she is not religious or doesn’t pray, not convinced or doesn’t feel like wearing Hejab!

Do you know why?

Coz its “3eeeb” to reveal her body or beauty? They get scared of what people, neighbors, and relatives would say ABOUT THEM if people saw their daughter uncovered?!

As much as the issue of the girl’s virginity can bring dishonor to the family, Hejab is no more a religious indication it’s all about 3eeeb and the culture….Plz don’t be idealistic abid and correct me if I’m mistaken…ppl in our societies think like that…don’t u agree?

D said...

Interesting post. My views on the matter are pretty much the same... even though I'm not a Muslim...
Eid Mubarak to you ...

abufares said...

my first comment on you blog.
great post about the freedom of choice for women. i, personally, don't like the hijab but wouldn't enforce my bias on anyone. i think that men should get out of the decision making process as far as the hijab is concerned.
thank you for speaking out your mind.

clayfuture said...

No offence to all the ladies, but I've found that girls who are forced to veil, to not talk to or meet guys, are the most desperate! It's true and I'm sure many of you will agree on this!

Veiling does not mean the woman is a good muslim or whatever. Just like a man being muslim does not mean he does not indulge in immoral activities!

I say let the woman decide what she wants to do, within reasonable limits of course.

clayfuture said...

Oh and Eid Mubarak to you all!

Summer said...

Heba, you have opened up the door for a lot of debate regarding the hijab matter...great post!
freedom of expression should touch all the matters in our lives, especially us women..anyway, i do not want to get much into this sensitive subject for many reasons. But elhamudulillah 3ala essalameh from the car accident and Happy Eid to you and your loved ones! Good to read from you!

Stained said...

men & women are treated equally Islam...just becoz men are required to protect the women in the family makes them feel superior which is bullshit....its their duty, it does not give them a special status in society...
about the hijab, well a father has a right to enlighten his daughter regarding the hijab & show her the right way...but in the end its the daughter's choice if she chooses to follow it or not but he also has to the right to correct her if she goes astray....a husband can request his wife to wear the hijab but thats all....if he gets abusive/forceful, the wife has complete right to take the husband to court....
& yes it is the man's weakness that they cannot control their desire's & it is neccessary for men to lower their gaze's when in the company of women....but they never seem to do that...especially if the women is in an skimpy outfit...
thats all I have to say....

***Eid Mubarak***

Stained said...

"men & women are 'to be' treated equally 'in' Islam"....missed a few words there :S

Abed. Hamdan said...

Well, as I said, nobody should force the woman to wear a veil, but if you wanna know the reason behind my personal choice, It's simple!

I prefere her because she's doing one hard 3ibada, specially if she's honest and doing it for the sake of Allah and Islam, not as something she was forced to do. so yes, I prefere the religous one and the one that obeys Islam as much as she can. Not as if im very religous but im trying.

Feras othman said...

"""In short, if a woman wants to cover herself from head to toe then she must be the one who is making such a decision neither her dad nor husband!""""

i do totallyagree with this concept,cuz 7ejab is not in that cover no..its in believing of the concept itself and why u took ur decision ,sinillar to the docotor when he wears the white dress he gotta be a docor and made all the obligations needs to worth being a docotor to ware this dress and swared to god to loyal his job ..etc

what i am trying to say is its not about the outer appearence anymore cuz we are in an open world ,small village ,,u might like to ware chinese or irish or even arab 3bayeh so does that make u any of them ??? i think we have to go back to the believing and convenced by yourself with the thought and concept cuz when u ware it ..sooner or later it has to be ur own decision .


ArabLady said...

Thx so much for wishing me a happy eid….and thx for coming by and dropping a line…

Abu Feras:
Waw….well said!
Welcome to my spot and would like to hear from you again…and no need to thank me for speaking out I’m here to voice my thoughts…

“ let the woman decide what she wants to do, within reasonable limits of course.”

Why within limits????? let the person irrespective of gender do wutever he/she wants as long as he/she is aware of the consequences and is ready to be responsible for his/her action!!

“you have opened up the door for a lot of debate regarding the hijab matter”

I understand that you prefer to stay neutral most of the time!! After all its ur decision…we might feel afraid to be socially rejected because of our controversial thoughts or rebellious mentality…yenkem at a certain stage conformity would be the only alternative!!

Anyways, Allah yesalmik …3adi met3awida daymaaan ;)..enjoying om el donya ;)

ArabLady said...

“men & women are treated equally Islam”

No comment…coz I believe they are not equal! Not equal for reasons.
I don’t marry 4 and divorce them whenever I want!
I’m not the one who doesn’t need “a ma7rem”! Just to mention a few.

So we conclude that THEY ARE NOT EQUAL BUT AGAIN FOR SOME REASONS! They are DIFFERENT when it comes to responsibilities/power/rights but definitely not EQUAL!

Hala Hala Walla bel Romantic ;)

Well yup Feras I am a bit well-known for my scandalous posts.. some ppl don’t dare to question their values or the social customs but I do….

To choose a true believer as partner is the key of happiness….but the formula must be inclusive ..well said …I do agree with u that Hejab is hard 3ibada!.........VERYYYYYYYY HARD ONE indeed!

Abed. Hamdan said...

It's not easy, specially these days. Every girl want to look cool and wear attractvie clothes especially the moda doesn't take hijab into account, and it's harder these days with all these models arround. But However, for some girls not wearing Hijab IS the hard thing. Some girls used to wear Hijab since childhood and hence they find it too hard to appear infront of everybody unveiled. It's like Praying; some people find it hard to pray 5 times aday but for others not praying in the mosque is hard , for example.

And I also beleive that the key of happiness with a girl is not just that she be a true beleiver, she should be a little bit smart :)

Allah yehdeena jamee3an, weywaffe2na weywaf2ek :)

zingtrial said...

Hi,Hijab is for Allah,it's how one wears it couses the problem.Be free to wear what you like,withen boundries of Islam.
My two bits He!He!He!
We are having enough trouble here with the hijab.
Wish you all the best
..............Have a nice EIDUL FITR....

Sex and Dubai said...

Hey AL - we agree that we think the children should take on their mothers last name! Isn't that the way we are going to be called up on dooms day anyway? Why not get used to hearing our names that way now?

Eid sa3eed!

Hareega said...

I wonder why is hijab a very importantg issue in the media while it shouldn't be. ITs issue is more of a women's right issue than a religious one I think. It's a way by which men can control women by issuing laws that either force her or prevent her from wearing it.

Arabized said...

eid mubarak


MD said...

Eid Mubarak my dearest! Hope you have a wonderful time Inshallah :)

MD said...

Btw...CALL ME!

Summer said...

Happy Eid to you and your loved ones. Enjoy the holiday!

caller said...

Asalam 3alaykom,
hi lady:)
3eed mubarak oo sa3eed insha2 allah..
I like you and i like the rebel in you..
but every issue has to be taken on it's own..as not kol ma howa mokhalef gor2a..it is a choice too..
to be free is to choose freely..your thoughts and actions..
And from allah's blessings that we are so different..when someone finds hijab as a hard 3ebada and other may find it as the easiest while to him constant praying or 3adam alghayba is the hardest..
We should never be forced into anything and by that i mean..even if dad or whoever forced hijab on me..it is MY choice to agree or disagree and girls who hate it find all ways to live without it behind dady's eyes..
now..being in an all veil country may be hard..i never lived that..as i'm egyptian and in egypt it is not a cultural thing..
it is not what's on the head..it's what's in the head and part of maturity is to embrase some obeyance and need it emotionaly..
Only if u choose to..
have i went on forever??!1:D well..excuse me:)

(Tealover) said...

ArabLady .. kol 3am o enti be alf khair o inshallah ben3ad 3aleekyo 3alli bet7ebeehom ya rab :)

moe said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
moe said...

konnichiwa, ArabLady

It is raining today.
I went to shopping by the bicycle.
I wore a black raincoat and a black hat.
How do you like that?
I mean,it look like hijab.
How many hijabs a woman will typically own?
My English is very poor.
please pardon me, if there are some faults.

thank you.(Arigato)

Al-Hanbali said...

Asalamu aleykum
Eid mubarak and may Allah make your days all happy in his obedience

Allah did not make the obligation for women to be modest in their dressing and to cover up but only for the benefit of both men and women, and Allah is the most just and wise in His laws

Prophet Muhammad did indeed enforce women to cover up at his times, there is no doubt about that and nothing to be ashamed of at all

Sadawi is not really the person you should be liking she insulted Islam plenty of times
So to answer the question why not?
Allah says, in surat al ahzab verse 5

ادْعُوهُمْ لِآبَائِهِمْ هُوَ أَقْسَطُ عِنْدَ اللَّهِ

Call them by (the names of) their fathers: that is juster in the sight of Allah

Finally I would like to remind myself and you with this ayah least we should not be of them inshaAllah

إِنَّ الَّذِينَ يُحِبُّونَ أَنْ تَشِيعَ الْفَاحِشَةُ فِي الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لَهُمْ عَذَابٌ أَلِيمٌ فِي الدُّنْيَا وَالْآخِرَةِ وَاللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنْتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ
وَلَوْلَا فَضْلُ اللَّهِ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَتُهُ وَأَنَّ اللَّهَ رَءُوفٌ رَحِيمٌ

Those who love (to see) scandal published broadcast among the Believers, will have a grievous Penalty in this life and in the Hereafter: Allah knows, and ye know not.
[20] Were it not for the grace and mercy of Allah on you, and that Allah is full of kindness and mercy, (ye would be ruined indeed). (An-Noor)

One more thing I invite you to read this post that I have written about hijab not so long ago


I wouldn’t mind at all if you disagree with me, we can inshaAllah have a discussion


Digital Nomad said...

Eid Mubarak, hope you are having a fantastic one!

ArabLady said...

Zingtrial, Abed,Shai’ra, Haree2a, arabzid, md, summer, caller, tealover, moe, q8ibloger THX & have the happiest Eid ever….

Digital do u know that u have just crossed my mind ;)
well…I’m not sure if its gonna be fantastic …I just remember the ppl in Iraq, Palestine & Lebanon …we eat &celebrate while others die in dozens and suffer under occupation!

بأي حال عدت يا عيد! فعلا

Take care and if u drive don’t speeeeeeeeeeeeed!


Libyan Violet said...

I just found your blog on Sex and Dubai, will be coming back for more . For the time being I wish you a Eid Mubarak !

Hi hi Arab lady.. I agree with you completely!
This article and the way you portray your
opinion is quite intriguing.. Yes I think that
it is a women's choice to cover up or not. I
think there are some women who do cover their
heads but yet their bodies are revealed in
very provocative ways! So it doesn't matter
what men say really.. It is a women's choice.
And women do what they want and dress the
way they want in the end!

Digital Nomad said...

re: "Am I a commodity, a peace of furniture, or does he own me?" Actually, sorry to say, but a vast majority of men, Muslim and non, really do treat "their" women like they own them. The guys who blog are the exceptions :) But you know what they say about exceptions: Exceptions prove the rule! :(

And you know how people always say, Why do the West think Muslim are oppressed just because of this small piece of cloth on our heads and/or over our faces? Well, yes, its just a small piece of cloth...so stop hyperventilating about it. You cannot honestly think that a woman who is forced to wear it will actually live by the principles the hijab is supposed to represent. She can always find ways around it. There are ways to be covered and exposed at the same time!

For example, take girls who wear the niqab, and only the eyes show. How often do you see the eyes being without five tons of eyeliner and mascara and eyeshadow? The eyes become so sexy and alluring, that the whole point of the niqab is defeated. So the girl is covered...but she still can turn a man on!

Basically, you can't force anything on people. And principles of faith MUST come from the heart. Just like you can't control people's political ideologies, you can't control the way people practice their faith. We don't have a single decent Muslim leader, so before reforming women into being hijabis, maybe those like forcing things on society should first focus on building a real Islamic leadership. That might make for a refreshing change!

And Arab Lady, sweetheart, I know what you mean about thinking about the sufferings elsewhere does make it extremely difficult to enjoy things like Eid. I feel you, hon! But, yes...we celebrate the day in order to give honor to it, and inshallah it is one more opportunity to do the least we can for all our ummah: make duaa for them. If in our celebration, we can thank Allah for the fine clothes and food and life that He has blessed us with, and remember our suffering brethren, then it was a day of positive accomplishment.

Sorry for the long reply to your excellent topic...but I have been thinking about it for a few days and it generated all this stuff! Excusez moi!

Bilal said...

Belated Eid Mubarak!

I see it this way:
Both men AND women have been instructed to dress modestly and lower their gazes!
If we all did this, society we live in would be a much better place.
'There is no compulsion in religion'- each person has their own relationship with their creator- if we could each concentrate on becoming better Muslims, the world we live in would be a much better place.

Um Haleema said...

Abed said.."And I also beleive that the key of happiness with a girl is not just that she be a true beleiver, she should be a little bit smart"

Just a little bit smart mind you. Otherwise she might not follow all these restrictions put on her by MEN with their weak egos.

:) nice post... enjoyed reading it.. totally agree with your point of view... yes ur right some non-hijjabis are more religous than some muhajbat.. yet that does not mean all muhajabat are not religious .. that does not mean hijjab is not an obligation in islam.. BUT... it should be a decision one TAKES on HER OWN.. it should not be forced because il mamnoo3 marghoob.. and if it is forced upon anyone it will only lead to the worst consquences and the total opposite....

unfortunately it is what we have a lot of today... lots of mohajjabat who have nothing to do with religion and just only make hijjab look bad... i saw a muhjabah today wearing STRETCH pants & body... u can see everything... of course with her scarf... is that Hijjab?!?!

so lets not judge or generalize by labeling woman as mohajabah or not.. or religious or not... ONly God knows what is in our hearts.. and sometimes even a girl who prays and looks decent turns out to be OTHERWISE!!! So shocking but not all those who pray do that with the RIGHT NIYAH (intention)..

Some just pray so that ppl say they pray.. or wear hijjab so that they gain respect or are said to be decent...

Anyway.. Allah yihdee il jamee3... im am proud to say im muhajjabah..a decison i took by myself BI FAdl ALLAh... and i also know lots of mohajabat... and lots of non mohajabat that are great MUSLIMS and hijjab is decision a person MUST make on thier own...

ANd if they ever DO make that decision on thier own.. they will feel truely blessed that God CHOSE them to wear this pride of being a muslim on thier head :)

al hamduliah... wa sorry i talk too much ...

Mise said...

Kul am w'inti ba'khair, Arablady ...I just arrived back in Abu Dhabi yesterday, so still a bit dazed ...I totally agree with your post, though. One can't ever judge a book by its cover.

Dubai Stud said...

For years many believed the earth to be flat, and the sun to be a god.

So it is with the veil. Or for that matter the shaving of hair on various parts of the body.

Consider this: person A shaves and wears the veil, but does no charitable work, while person B, who does not shave or wear the veil, spends their spare time doing charitable work. Who is the better person in the eyes of Islam?

The same argument applies to any religion. the act of wearing a cross does not make you a good christian.

It's not the outward appearence that matters so much as the personality within.

I leave you with this maxim:

"It is far better to have sat with the devil, and having tasted his merchandise, to then rise above to the levels of true morality - rather than hiding behind the veil of enforced morality, never having sampled the temptattions of the world, yet harbouring secret longing within."
Dubai Stud maximus 26.10.6

Abed. Hamdan said...

Um Halihma:


you got me very wrong !! I didn't say her smartness should be little !! I meant the opposite !!!

I said she should be a little bit(little bit doesn't mean not smart, it means i want her smart!) smart! Im not expecting her to be Einstein !! but I would like the girl to be smart, understanding, and caring!!

Restrictions ?? Weak Egos ??

sorry, but you are over-generalizing and very judgemental. I don't need a girl that accept restrictions from others! Why should I set restrictions on her ? If im with an understanding and smart girl, so nobody needs to set any restrictions on anybody.

and Hello ?? Tell me, who can set restrictions on anybody these days ?? and not all men have weak egos, and you haven't met all the men in the world.

If the girl is veiled (Mohajjabe), then she's mohajjabe for herself not for me. I would like to be with mohajjaba girl, but a girl that's veiled for Allah, not for me!

the last thing in the world i want is to be with a hypocrite!

Nash said...

Eid Mubarak ArabLady.

As for Hijab, it is an obligation for women to cover up, unfortunately some of the westerners do not understand the underlying reasons, and they use it for their own political gain.

Dubai Stud said...

"... it is an obligation for women to cover up" lol!

nash, how about paying some attention to real obligations under Islam, such as treating migrant workers with respect and fairness?

do not taint women by saying they are the cause of your sins.

I suppose you would also ay that themigrant workers should be 'hidden in shanty towns incase their plight tempts you into feelings of remorse for them?

"...but a girl that's veiled for Allah, not for me"

hamdan, what a load of popycock! What does 'wearing the veil for Allah" mean??

Let's face it, I think you prefer a girl who wears a veil because she is more likely to be subservient to your commands.

"Always be eager to give, and your bowl shall be be ever full"
Dubai Stud maximus 27.10.6

Al-Hanbali said...

to sum it up for you all
its all about the fundamentals of belief

if you call your self muslim and thats your religion, then it entails specific beliefs and actions, and it should be our grounds to debate on issues

"It is not fitting for a Believer, man or woman, when a matter has been decided by Allah and His Messenger to have any option about their decision: if any one disobeys Allah and His Messenger, he is indeed on a clearly wrong Path.
(Al-Ahzab 33:36)

other wise those who claim to be muslim and argue against what Allah asks from them then they are hypocrites

Allah has set clear guidelines obligations and extra things we dont have to do but only make our life better,,

Allah is the most wise and most knowledgable and His laws are only a reflection of that,,

yet our desiers and illnesses of our hearts stop us from submitting to Allah..

Islam is submitting to your creator in willingness, love and humblness, and picking and choosing what suits our desiers negates this Islam..

Islam is the only way to success not becuase it is part of our culture or history, but because it is the final Message from The Lord of this world and its Creator to humanity that is errorless and consistant.

أفحكم الجـــاهلية يبغون و من أحسن من الله حكما لقوم يوقنون

Do they seek then the judgment of Jahiliya, And who is better in judgment than Allah for a people who have firm faith!

Abed. Hamdan said...

Dubai Stud:

what commands ??

dude, do you even know me ??

Im not into having conversation with you. but veil for allah, means that she's obeying allah and wearing veil as part of islam. If you have something personal with Hijab then it's your business not mine.

Nash said...

Dubai stud,

You might have interesting points to debate, but out of respect to the owner of this blog (ArabLady), I will refrain from commenting.

Have a nice day.

ArabLady said...

Guys we are not arguing whether or not Islam asks women to cover up.
Full stop……

Is it hard to stick to the points discussed?
The points I highlighted in the post are as follows

-In male-dominated societies, some women are forced to cover up although they might not be convinced or at least not willing to take such a step? Why I dunno it’s her problem with Allah and her religious beliefs. She might not be ready…..it’s not the point here

At any rate...the result would be that

-Veil/ Hejab is misrepresented and the woman ends up unhappy/ dissatisfied…just pleasing the society not going for what she really wants….Call her Disbeliever/Kafira…wut ever u want…its not my problem but I’m stating facts and true examples!

-Hejab is more than covering the hair! Hence, not every uncovered women is a bitch/disbeliever…and plz don’t convince me that u r a PERFECT MUSLIM who abides by Islam teachings !! Aren’t we living in Muslim countries…then yalla explain the shit going on here: prostitution, Alcohol, crimes….blab blah…are they committed by disbelievers Women!

So lets focus on more important issues in our societies in stead of judging who is a true Muslim…and ya this women is not covered etc….Again Hejab is not a measurement of faith nor manners!

Covering our bodies in order to achieve the goals of Hejab (protecting the society from sins…ect) is not women’s responsibility…Just Don’t look/lower ur gaze! Too difficult !


How come that u accuse me of spreading razila in society!!!

Q8ibloger said...

Finally I would like to remind myself and you with this ayah least we should not be of them inshaAllah

إِنَّ الَّذِينَ يُحِبُّونَ أَنْ تَشِيعَ الْفَاحِشَةُ فِي الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لَهُمْ عَذَابٌ أَلِيمٌ فِي الدُّنْيَا وَالْآخِرَةِ وَاللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنْتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ
وَلَوْلَا فَضْلُ اللَّهِ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَتُهُ وَأَنَّ اللَّهَ رَءُوفٌ رَحِيمٌ

I discuss thing that happen in our life! If u choose to be blind and ignore wut is happening then enta 7or!

“Sadawi is not really the person you should be liking she insulted Islam plenty of times” …

I guess some ppl who called themselves “True Muslims” insulted the religion more than her in case she ever did….have u read any of her books? Yes I agree that she has some controversial ideas …at least she wishes if women can spend money on books as much as they spend on make up and shoes… !!!

She voices the pain of the women in Egypt ..the pain of the peasants and uneducated women in a male dominant society…..lets assume that she is Christian or a disbeliever …so wut! Its none of my business…

Lets accept ppl as they are….why we waannaaa change ppl’s religions, beliefs, and mentalities ….!

“Lets celebrate the differences”….a statement that I will never forget said by one of my best professors ……..

Abed says “Tell me, who can set restrictions on anybody these days ??”

No comment!!

Wish if u could be a woman for one week only, then u would answer the question urself………

Dubai Stud said...

hamdan and nash, your response would suggest you have not yet grasped how blogs function, and what freedom of speech means. If I have angered you, then that's unfortunate. But what is more important, if my words have sparked an introspection of you views, then I am happy. And why drag arablady into this? She has her own views, and will make them known if she so wishes, I'm sure. Resorting to threats is rather a shallow response to legitimate views.

"..veil for allah, means that she's obeying allah.."

there are far more important ways of obeying Allah, such as helping the needy, treating all others with respect and equality, practicing humility, etc. In my view the veil is just a distraction - I prefer to see the person for what they are, rather than basing my opinion on some archaic rule or cutom. I would never dream of saying to a muslim that they should not wear a veil - but that's not the same as expressing my views on the veil. Nor would I treat a veil-wearing woman any different from a one who doesn't.

Now that is respect, but also freedom of speech.

q8ibloger, this is what Australia's most senior Muslim cleric, Sheikh Taj el-Din al-Hilali has to say on the subject of wearing veils:

"If you take out uncovered meat and place it outside... and the cats come and eat it... whose fault is it, the cats' or the uncovered meat?"

The uncovered meat is the problem, he went on to say.

"If she was in her room, in her home, in her hijab, no problem would have occurred," he added.

Sheikh Hilali also condemned women who swayed suggestively and wore make-up, implying they attracted sexual assault.

"Then you get a judge without mercy... and gives you 65 years," he added.
Taken from BBC news

"Islam is the only way to success..."

So also say the Christians. I'm afraid this is such a fundamental error, I am forced to say that any religion that condemn's other believers as kafirs are still living in the stone age on this point.

I would argue that Allah has given us a brain to think with and it is our obligation to use it to make the right decisions in accordance with Islam, rather than following blindly the edicts of some misled cleric. This confusion / brainwashing has unfortunately led a small minority into believing that killing innocent members of the public is acceptable in the eyes of Allah.

"Discarding all show of religiousity and pomposity, the true believers showed God their allegience by doing good deeds, and seeing God in all"
Dubai Stud maximus

Dubai Stud said...

arablady, you hadn't posted your comment when I wrote my comment, hence no reference to any of the points you made.

S!lent.Sp!r!t said...

Wow .. such a long discussion and a very interesting topic with varied opinions..

“ let the woman decide what she wants to do, within reasonable limits of course.”

Why within limits????? let the person irrespective of gender do wutever he/she wants as long as he/she is aware of the consequences and is ready to be responsible for his/her action!!"

Yes Islam says that everyone is to choose as the rightous is known " la ikrah fe deen qad tabayan el roshd mn el '3ay" but also, when giving freedom even to a kid, as a mother you should put limitations and a mother knows what is best for the kid esp with him clinging to her. Now looking into God who has created us and knows us even better than any, there are specific rules that would prevent alot of harm to human.

Also what Dubai Stud said in reference to the shiekh is absolutly right. Yeh women have the right to show up, but to an extent. Alot of the flirting in Dubai is not the guys problem, but the women who have loads of makeup, dress poorly if anything!!

I have been in the States and yeh its normal for gals to wear whatever they want, but almost naked!! common that is more of seducing guys than wearing... I wouldn't believe a women would want ppl to respect her with her being half naked ..

so .. it is a choice .. but to be a real muslim and a good one even with many wearing it and not being . you either take the whole package .. or get ajr as much as you did ...

Abed. Hamdan said...

Dubai Stud:

dude, despite your wrong way in discussion, I know your intentions are good; that's why Im going to answer. I couldn't agree more that there are way more important things to obey allah by, and as I said above, the last thing in the world I want is to be with a hypocrite.

Here we are talking about Hijab, the whole point is that MY PERSONAL opinion is I prefere to be with muhajjaba! I think I have the whole freedom to prefere someone over the other, right ? though It's not essential for me, however. I know there are many other ways to worship Allah, but here we are talking about this. For example, I prefere a girl that pray and praying is more important that hijab for me.

Did you get my idea ?

don't mix points, I was talking about my personal choice. Thanks for the concern anyway :)

Abed. Hamdan said...


dear friend,

I totally understand that there are many restrictions on girls in the oriental society than than on men, and I'm always advocating woman.

I was just trying to say that time is changing, and depends on the family, these restrictions are vanishing gradually :)

Dubai Stud said...

Have a look at this from MechanicalCrowds.

just want to say
Eid Mobarak...
or Eid Saeed not Mobarak :)

ArabLady said...

THX although its too late!

Anonymous said...

Wonderful dialogue you have here. This is my first visit to this blog. I agree with AL. But to have complete control of themselves women should first become independent. You cannot depend on your father, brother, husband or other male relatives for sustenance and security and not obey them, its not quite possible. Women should be the judge of how to dress in public. As for as provoking the desire in males is concerned. The most effective way would be to have all women to wear the skimpiest dresses of their choice (the weather permiting). Men will soon become tired of seeing fashionably uncovered ladies everywhere that instead of lowering their eyes they will lose complete interest in ladies . This will be a victory for the women. This ultimately will take us to a stage where women & men will see each other as persons and not as objects of desire!

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